Dear Swiss Chalet,
Do you know why I choose you over Jack Asstor's, Montana's, Kelsey's, or any other generic "family-style" restaurant when I want some cheap food that's arguably a bit more healthy than McDonald's?
Partly it's because your dipping sauce is second to none. Partly it's because "1/4 chicken white with fries" is nearly as Canadian a term as "double double."
But mostly it's because I can actually sit through a meal at your establishment without being continually assaulted by some horrid "Birthday Celebration" that forces your entirely unwilling staff to sing some sort of lame song (usually requiring everyone to"clap on no particular beat") to a patron who only wanted a little free cake.
Sadly, today I realized this advantage to eating at your establisment was no more.
Honestly, having to listen to your staff parade around the floor like complete fools three times over the course of one hour during my lunch today was simply not cool.
Trust me, it was all I could do to keep from trying to drown myself in those cute little "finger bowls" full of hot water and lemon slices - and that would've been a PR nightmare for you had I not held back.
I'm sure the three birthday boys and girls you "serenaded" today would've been equally as impressed with their free slice of cake had you just left the choir behind. I know I would have at the least, and I'm guessing it's a safe bet the rest of today's patrons probably would have appreciated the lack of idiocy too.
Please, for the love of all that is good and decent, stop this insanity and return to the days of yore when Swiss Chalet was conservative, mild-mannered and completely predicatble. You've got the corner on this market, but I can see your grip loosening.
Stay strong. Nip this in the bud.
Also: my Shirley Temple didn't come with one of those sword-skewered-cherry-and-orange slice things.